Patterns exist everywhere, and consider the definition of a pattern: a form or model, a natural or chance configuration, or a reliable sample of traits, acts, tendencies or other observable characteristics of a person. Ah, that last one, the one about traits, acts, and tendencies, that’s the one. And the word “reliable” plays an important part in that definition. The very nature of a pattern is reliable repetition… a thing to be repeated over and over.
We all exhibit patterns, and patterns in a person’s life are very telling… that is if you know how to decode them. Most people don’t. In fact, most people can’t even decode their own patterns, no matter how many times they’re repeated.
Each one of us has our own reality – not shared with anyone else. You have one perception – your own. One viewpoint – your own. Try asking someone who has never lived outside of Idaho to explain what it’s like to live in the Caribbean, in Mexico, or in New York City. They can’t because they have never lived an alternate reality, an alternate life. Patterns make people. Patterns create lives.
I’ve written this book because I understand that patterns are revealing, but the most important thing about them – in fact, the only way to really design and live the life you want – is to be able to decode them. Decoding those patterns helps us understand what purpose they serve. They reveal what blind spots we have. These blind spots are harmful if not uncovered. They cause the greatest frustrations and heartache in our lives. In my line of work and in coaching through the years, I’ve heard so many people say things at the start of our work together like, “I’ve been to many counselors and none has helped.” Or “I worked with a coach and what they suggested worked… for a while, but then things got mucky again, and the same problems cropped up.”
The latter statement doesn’t really surprise me because the previous counselor/coach/therapist failed to decode the pattern. I’m happy to tell you that one of the other statements we’ve heard in our business is, “You weren’t the first coach I went to but you were the last.” Why? Because of the results. Not because I have some sort of magic fairy dust, but because I’ve been able to uncover the diagnostic code and that makes all the difference. Without understanding the diagnostic code, you will never arrive at a solution.